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Markham and Stackhouse
05 March 2006 @ 01:10 am
We feel bad.

Really bad.

We didn't mean to lose him. He just got away from us. There are a lot of them.

Sorry?
 
 
Current Mood: nervous
 
 
Markham and Stackhouse
06 December 2005 @ 05:17 pm
When Markham turns up duct taped to something?

No one help him.
 
 
Current Mood: amused
 
 
Markham and Stackhouse
06 December 2005 @ 05:01 pm
Hahahaha.

Lieutenant White is going to kill me dead.
 
 
Current Mood: devious
 
 
Markham and Stackhouse
05 October 2005 @ 10:11 pm
General happenings:

-Sam got hit by a tree.

-Who gets hit by a tree?

-...Sam apparently.

Personal happenings:

-Nothing all that new here.

Bets:

-How long until the colonel ends up in the infirmary again. 4:1 in favour of less than a month.
 
 
Current Mood: calm
 
 
Markham and Stackhouse
21 September 2005 @ 04:15 pm
"If there is someone on your friends list you would like to take, strip naked, tie them to a bed post, lick them until they scream, then fuck them until both of you are senseless and unable to fuck anymore, then wait about five minutes and do it all over again, then post this exact sentence in YOUR journal."
 
 
Current Mood: embarrassed
 
 
Markham and Stackhouse
21 September 2005 @ 04:14 pm
"If there is someone on your friends list you would like to take, strip naked, tie them to a bed post, lick them until they scream, then fuck them until both of you are senseless and unable to fuck anymore, then wait about five minutes and do it all over again, then post this exact sentence in YOUR journal."
 
 
Current Mood: flirty
 
 
Markham and Stackhouse
12 September 2005 @ 10:11 pm
General Happenings:

-Colonel Sheppard is bugging out.

-Literally.

-I'm not going to take him out.

-Me neither.

Personal Happenings:

-Things are good. Aside from the bugging stress.

Bets:

-How long until Doctor Crane snaps. Again. 3:1 in favour of a month. 2:1 in favour of two weeks. 6:1 in favour of less than. 6:1 in favour of more than a month.
 
 
Current Mood: calm
 
 
Markham and Stackhouse
29 August 2005 @ 08:15 pm
What the hell is this?

Big city, lots of soldiers who KNOW MY NAME.

And we're right on the beach or something because I can SEE the ocean out the windows and stuff.

...Okay, so. Where am I and how did I get here seem to be the logical places to go with this.

...WHRE AM I?
 
 
Current Mood: FLIPPING OUT!
 
 
Markham and Stackhouse
28 August 2005 @ 11:46 am
1. Go into your livejournal archive
2. Find your 23rd 11th post.
3. Find your 5th sentence (or closest to, if you're laconic)
4. Post the text of your sentence in this post along with these instructions.
5. Tag 5 people on your friend's list.


Novak is back and safe. I'm estatic.
 
 
Current Mood: accomplished
 
 
Markham and Stackhouse
07 August 2005 @ 04:26 am
General happenings:

-Doctor Grodin's still missing.

-So's the girl.

Personal happenings:

-Novak is back and safe. I'm estatic.

-I'm just glad you've stopped moping.

Bets:

-Hermiod and Doctor McKay are long lost siblings. Odds are 3:1 in favour.
 
 
Current Mood: ecstatic
 
 
Markham and Stackhouse
03 August 2005 @ 04:17 am
General Happenings:

-Doc Grodin's been kidnapped. We're on alert.

-Major's looking for a small team to act as security at Arkham Asylum. See Lieutenant to apply.

Personal happenings:

-Novak's hot!

-I might gag.

Bets:

-Hermiod and Doctor McKay are long lost siblings. Odds are 4:1 in favour.

-Hours of sleep Doctor McKay gets. 3:1 in favour of less than ten. 1:2 in favour of less than seven. 1:1 in favour of less than three.

-If you replaced Beckett's haggis with vegetarian haggis, would he notice? Odds are 2:1 in favour. 1:3 in favour of him gagging. No bets on his not noticing.

-Doctor Beckett reproves Major Sheppard-Sam relationship. 200:1 in favour. If proven wrong, Doctor Beckett will be richest man on Atlantis.

-Why is Major Sheppard so bipolar recently? Odds are 100:1 in favour of his girlfriend's insanity. 10:1 in favour of stress. 40:3 in favour of boredem. 50:1 in favour of a combination of the three.
 
 
Current Mood: working
 
 
Markham and Stackhouse
01 August 2005 @ 12:56 am
General Happenings:

-Military personell should still be watching their step. Major's not himself yet.

-Lieutenant's not himself either. Too much stress. Watch your step with him, too.

Personal Happenings:

-Everyone really has to stop with the teasing about me and Novak.

-We won't, though.

-I hate you all.

Bets:

-Hermiod and Doctor McKay are long lost siblings. Odds are 3:1 in favour.

-Hours of sleep Doctor McKay gets. 1:1 in favour of less than ten. 1:3 in favour of less than seven. 2:3 in favour of less than three.

-If you replaced Beckett's haggis with vegetarian haggis, would he notice? Odds are 3:1 in favour. 1:4 in favour of him gagging. No bets on his not noticing.

-Doctor Beckett reproves Major Sheppard-Sam relationship. 200:1 in favour. If proven wrong, Doctor Beckett will be richest man on Atlantis.

-Why is Major Sheppard so bipolar recently? Odds are 50:2 in favour of his girlfriend's insanity. 20:1 in favour of stress. 20:3 in favour of boredem. 30:1 in favour of a combination of the three.
 
 
Current Mood: aggravated
 
 
Markham and Stackhouse
31 July 2005 @ 03:08 am
General Happenings:

-The major's depressed again.

-And snappy.

-We advise all military personell to watch your step.

Personal Happenings:

-I totally like Doctor Novak. Deal with it.

-I totally need to get laid.

Bets:

-Hermiod and Doctor McKay are long lost siblings. Odds are 2:1 in favour.

-Hours of sleep Doctor McKay gets. 3:1 in favour of less than ten. 1:2 in favour of less than seven. 2:5 in favour of less than three.

-If you replaced Beckett's haggis with vegetarian haggis, would he notice? Odds are 2:1 in favour. 1:5 in favour of him gagging. No bets on his not noticing.

-Doctor Beckett reproves Major Sheppard-Sam relationship. 200:1 in favour. If proven wrong, Major Sheppard Doctor Beckett will be richest man on Atlantis.

-Why is Major Sheppard so bipolar recently? Odds are 20:1 in favour of his girlfriend's insanity.
 
 
Current Mood: embarrassed
 
 
Markham and Stackhouse
30 July 2005 @ 04:50 am
General happenings:

-Tube babies were born.

-Two boys, one girl.

-They're cute.

Personal happenings:

-Markham is still crushing on Novak.

-So?

Bets:

-Why is Major Sheppard so weirdly happy recently? Answered. Rosie wins pot.

-Will the tube babies become real babies and when? Answered. Doctor Simpson wins biggest pot for correct date.

-Sex of each tube. Answered. Doctors Weir and Alberts split pot.

-Hermiod and Doctor McKay are long lost siblings. Odds are 3:1 in favour.

-Hours of sleep Doctor McKay gets. 2:1 in favour of less than ten. 1:2 in favour of less than seven. 1:7 in favour of less than three.

-If you replaced Beckett's haggis with vegetarian haggis, would he notice? Odds are 3:1 in favour. 1:2 in favour of him gagging. No bets on his not noticing.

-Doctor Beckett reproves Major Sheppard-Sam relationship. 200:1 in favour. If proven wrong, Major Sheppard Doctor Beckett will be richest man on Atlantis.
 
 
Current Mood: accomplished
 
 
Markham and Stackhouse
29 July 2005 @ 03:32 am
General Happenings:

-The major's son took away the blue fish.

-Which is a good thing.

-In Stackhouse's world.


Personal Happenings:

-Markham's crushing on Novak.

-Stackhouse is a dirty liar.

Bets:

-Hermiod and Doctor McKay are long lost siblings. Odds are 8:1 in favour.

-Hours of sleep Doctor McKay gets. 4:1 in favour of less than ten. 5:2 in favour of less than seven. 1:3 in favour of less than three.

-If you replaced Beckett's haggis with vegetarian haggis, would he notice? Odds are 4:1 in favour. 1:1 in favour of him gagging. No bets on his not noticing.

-Doctor Beckett reproves Major Sheppard-Sam relationship. 200:1 in favour. If proven wrong, Major Sheppard Doctor Beckett will be richest man on Atlantis.

-The major's son has something worse than a cold. Odds are 10:1 in favour. 1:200 in favour of "he's faking."

-Sex of each tube. Odds are 6:1 on the blue tube being male. 5:1 on the purple and sparkly one being female. 3:1 on the one that looks like a bruise being female.

-Will the tube babies become real babies and when? Odds are 11:2 in favour of yes. Dates can be submitted to Sergeant Markham.

-Why is Major Sheppard so weirdly happy recently? Odds are 8:1 in favour of sex. 10:1 in favour of the grandkids. 15:2 in favour of both. 1:2 in favour of something else all together.

Major Sheppard's girlfriend?
Rosie.
What?
Her name's Rosie.
Oh. Rosie? Don't be mad about this one, please? It's nothing personal.
If you can tell us what it is, you'll win.
Don't bribe the major's girlfriend!
Why not? You gamble with his son!
 
 
Current Mood: devious
 
 
Markham and Stackhouse
28 July 2005 @ 03:52 am
General happenings:

-We've found out that Doctor Zelenka and the major's son's test tubes are babies.

Personal happenings:

-Doctor Novak rocks my standard issue socks.

-Doctor Novak is also childish.

Bets:

-Hermiod and Doctor McKay are long lost siblings. Odds are 9:1 in favour.

-Hours of sleep Doctor McKay gets. 6:1 in favour of less than ten. 7:2 in favour of less than seven. 4:3 in favour of less than three.

-If you replaced Beckett's haggis with vegetarian haggis, would he notice? Odds are 3:1 in favour. 4:1 in favour of him gagging. No bets on his not noticing.

-Doctor Beckett reproves Major Sheppard-Sam relationship. 200:1 in favour. If proven wrong, Major Sheppard Doctor Beckett will be richest man on Atlantis.

-The major's son has something worse than a cold. Odds are 15:2 in favour. 1:200 in favour of "he's faking."

-Sex of each tube. Odds are 2:1 on the blue tube being male. 2:1 on the purple and sparkly one being female. 1:1 on the one that looks like a bruise being female.

-Will the tube babies become real babies and when? Odds are 15:1 in favour of yes. Dates can be submitted to Sergeant Markham.
 
 
Current Mood: confused
 
 
Markham and Stackhouse
26 July 2005 @ 01:20 am
General Happenings:

-Doctor Zelenka and the major's son are out of the lab.

-And there are purple test tubes. We don't know what's in them.

-Yet.

Personal Happenings:

-Major Sheppard's ordered us to cancel or change the bet regarding his sex life.

Bets:

-Hermiod and Doctor McKay are long lost siblings. Odds are 5:2 in favour.

-Hours of sleep Doctor McKay gets. 6:1 in favour of less than ten. 7:2 in favour of less than seven. 4:3 in favour of less than three.

-If you replaced Beckett's haggis with vegetarian haggis, would he notice? Odds are 4:1 in favour. 3:1 in favour of him gagging. No bets on his not noticing.

-Major Sheppard will never get laid again. Odds are 1:1 in favour. 9:1 in favour of him looking elsewhere. 10:1 in favour of him looking to Doctor Crane. 2:1 in favour of him looking to Doctor Zelenka. 4:1 in favour of him looking to Doctor McKay. Cancelled at the Major's orders.

-Hermiod and Doctor Novak are lying about doing each other. Odds are 14:1 in favour.

-Doctor Beckett reproves Major Sheppard-Sam relationship. 200:1 in favour. If proven wrong, Major Sheppard Doctor Beckett will be richest man on Atlantis.

-The major's son has something worse than a cold. Odds are 5:2 in favour. 1:20 in favour of "he's faking."
 
 
Current Mood: chipper
 
 
Markham and Stackhouse
25 July 2005 @ 03:14 am
General happenings:

Snow's stopped. Nothing else new.

Personal happenings:

Nothing new here either.

We need lives.

Or something.

Bets:

-Hermiod and Doctor McKay are long lost siblings. Odds are 4:1 in favour.

-Hours of sleep Doctor McKay gets. 4:1 in favour of less than ten. 5:2 in favour of less than seven. 5:3 in favour of less than three.

-If you replaced Beckett's haggis with vegetarian haggis, would he notice? Odds are 2:1 in favour. 1:1 in favour of him gagging. No bets on his not noticing.

-Major Sheppard will never get laid again. Odds are 1:1 in favour. 9:1 in favour of him looking elsewhere. 10:1 in favour of him looking to Doctor Crane. 2:1 in favour of him looking to Doctor Zelenka. 4:1 in favour of him looking to Doctor McKay.

-Hermiod and Doctor Novak are lying about doing each other. Odds are 12:1 in favour.

-Doctor Beckett reproves Major Sheppard-Sam relationship. 200:1 in favour. If proven wrong, Major Sheppard Doctor Beckett will be richest man on Atlantis.
 
 
Current Mood: bored
 
 
Markham and Stackhouse
24 July 2005 @ 02:40 am
General happenings:

Major Sheppard is giving us busy work now.

Doctor Zelenka and the Major's son are locked in the Doc's lab together now.

Major's giving McKay and Novak one chance go get it open before he blows it

It'll be a good show, either way.

Personal happenings:

Still not getting any.

Journal title? Still funny.

Markham? Still not funny.

Bets:

-Hermiod and Doctor Novak are doing each other. Proven. Doctor Zelenka takes biggest pot.

-Sam is actually Major Sheppard's son. Proven. Doctors Grodin and Miko take biggest pots.

-Hermiod and Doctor McKay are long lost siblings. Odds are 5:1 in favour.

-Hours of sleep Doctor McKay gets. 9:2 in favour of less than ten. 3:2 in favour of less than seven. 5:1 in favour of less than three.

-If you replaced Beckett's haggis with vegetarian haggis, would he notice? Odds are 3:1 in favour. 2:1 in favour of him gagging. No bets on his not noticing.

-Major Sheppard will never get laid again. Odds are 3:1 in favour. 4:1 in favour of him looking elsewhere. 3:1 in favour of him looking to Doctor Crane. 1:1 in favour of him looking to Doctor Zelenka. 5:1 in favour of him looking to Doctor McKay.

-Hermiod and Doctor Novak are lying about doing each other. Odds are 10:1 in favour.

-Doctor Beckett reproves Major Sheppard-Sam relationship. 200:1 in favour. If proven wrong, Major Sheppard will be richest man on Atlantis.
 
 
Current Mood: cheerful
 
 
Markham and Stackhouse
23 July 2005 @ 12:35 am
General happenings:

-Doctor Weir says she'll consider increasing off world missions.

-Doctor Weir also says she'll work on finding something for us soldiers to do.

-Major Sheppard and Lieutenant Ford have been running us through drills.


Personal happenings:

-Still not getting any.

-Ditto.

-Our journal has the best title ever.

-Markham ISN'T funny.

Bets:

-Hermiod and Doctor McKay are long lost siblings. Odds are 4:1 in favour.

-Hermiod and Doctor Novak are doing each other. Odds are 3:1 in favour and 6:1 in favour of "ew."

-Hours of sleep Doctor McKay gets. 10:1 in favour of less than ten. 6:1 in favour of less than seven. 4:1 in favour of less than three.

-If you replaced Beckett's haggis with vegetarian haggis, would he notice? Odds are 3:1 in favour. 2:1 in favour of him gagging.

-Major Sheppard will never get laid again. Odds are 3:1 in favour. 2:1 in favour of him looking elsewhere. 1:1 in favour of him looking to Doctor Crane. 1:1 in favour of him looking to Doctor Zelenka. 5:1 in favour of him looking to Doctor McKay.

-Sam is actually Major Sheppard's son. Odds are 2:1 in favour. 3:1 we can convince Beckett to do the test.
 
 
Current Mood: calm